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Carl Thomas

Pastor | Live Free Founder | Lover of Jesus, Philly sports, fitness, tattoos, sarcasm, and craft beers.

Some time back I was talking to a friend of mine who is part of the small group I lead with Small Groups Online.

I asked him how his week was, and he told me it was pretty good, except for the fact that he just had some wisdom teeth pulled – OUCH!!! 😱

Anyway, we got talking about that because I had all four of mine pulled back in my twenties, and I was laughing about the fact that I was on painkillers at the time and after a few days I felt so good (except for some minor swelling) that I forgot to take my medicine in the morning.

Well, it only took a few hours for me to realize why I needed those painkillers in the first place.

I went from no pain to extreme pain in the absence of the medication.

This whole conversation got me thinking, “Wow, I think there’s a lesson here.”

You see, it’s funny how medication and pain work.

Often we get so acclimated to the medicine that we then forget about the pain which leads us to think we are healthy when, in fact, we are just sick and numb.

Isn’t that kind of how porn works with so many of us?

We get so used to coping with anxieties, depression, loneliness, and other struggles through the use of porn or masturbation that we forget what it’s like to actually live as a healthy individual. Beyond that, the dopamine release we get from acting out has such a euphoric affect that we sometimes don’t even realize that we are feeling pain.

Our medicated lifestyle becomes the new normal.

Don’t get me wrong. When you have your wisdom teeth pulled out, you’re going to need some medicine for a few days. I learned that myself.

But as the pain lessens, so does the need for medicine.


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Unfortunately, with porn and the type of pain that we’re dealing with, it’s not so simple.

You see, we use porn and masturbation to detach from all sorts of pains that we, quite frankly, are often not even aware of.

  • The pain of past abuse.
  • The pain of rejection.
  • The pain of shame.
  • The pain of abandonment.
  • The pain of feeling worthless.

These types of pain don’t just go away like tooth pain.

Time alone does not make it better.

Unlike wisdom teeth, the pain that you may be dealing with through the use of porn is not going to go away on its own. It needs to be addressed and dealt with.

The good news is if you deal with the pain, then you also get rid of the need for the medication.

The bad news is, dealing with the pain is not fun.

So in summary, I want to leave you with these two questions:

First, are you aware of your pain or are you too detached from it because of the medication?

Are you just doing life as “normal,” but in reality, the way you’re doing life is as abnormal as you could possibly think.

And second, IF you are aware of the pain and realize that you are leaning on your medication, what are you doing about it?  

Are you content with relying on your “meds” or do you want to get off them someday?

Do you want to learn how to live a free and healthy life without the need for things like porn and masturbation that do nothing but serve to slowly erode the quality of your life?

Don’t be satisfied with a numb existence.
Don’t be satisfied with a medicated existence.
Don’t be satisfied with a detached existence.

You deserve so much better than that.

You just need to go after it.

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