You Must Want Freedom to Have It
In last week’s post I raised a question concerning freedom.
That question was… If a Christian is “free” in Christ then why do so many men and women continue to struggle with porn addiction?
Honestly, when you think about it, this is a valid question.
There are thousands of men and women going through life, seemingly not able to defeat their “porn demons.” Doesn’t seem like there is a whole lot of freedom going on.
Think about it.
For those of us who live in a “free” country, we may have the freedom to do what we want (except pay taxes… try that one and see how it goes) but yet many of us willingly subject ourselves to the power of others every day.
Take for instance a job.
Employment to a great extent is an infringement on our freedom. We daily, and willingly, subject our own will to that of our boss in exchange for a paycheck. Of course, we all need jobs to pay the bills but while a job does offer us an income it definitely doesn’t offer freedom.
When I was in the early stages of my sobriety (from porn) I remember one time asking myself, “So does this mean I’ll never look at porn again?”
Honestly that idea scared me a little.
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You see, while porn was a slave master I wanted to get rid of, it was also a source of comfort. I had used porn for years to get through many tough times. Times when I was feeling stressed, angry, bored, or lonely.
Of course now, over a decade later, it doesn’t freak me out at all thinking that same thing. I don’t need that slave master anymore. I’ve tasted freedom for some time now and freedom tastes good.
Why would I ever want to go back?
I honestly think a lot of people who struggle with porn are in this same boat I found myself in years ago.
I believe if you asked them to get real honest, they would admit that they enjoy the comfort level porn use brings them. Yes, they recognize that they are living in submission to a pretty brutal slave master but in those moments of crisis and anxiety that “boss” seems pretty welcoming and kind.
It’s like a job.
A porn addict gives up their freedom in exchange for something. That something is comfort.
Unless you’ve tasted and actually experienced real “freedom,” the idea of a porn free existence is a bit daunting. It’s not easy walking away from the thing that has “helped” you all those years.
Who’s going to be there when you are feeling lonely or anxious if not your welcoming master?
The key is this.
Don’t worry about twenty years from now. Worry about today, this week, this month, and so on. It will take some time, but after enough sobriety and healing you will start to realize that you don’t need that slave master anymore.
Eventually you won’t want that “comfort” and you will be able to look ahead and not fear a porn free existence. When this happens you’ll finally be ready to experience real freedom.
So, if you feel like you aren’t living in freedom…
Before you blame God.
Before you blame your spouse.
Before you abandon or reformulate your belief systems.
Ask yourself, do I really want freedom or do I like the comfort that comes with being a slave?
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